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Timothy’s Christmas Adventure: It’s A Wonderful GPA




Timothy’s Christmas Adventure: PART I

Dearest Participants,

It’s the most wonderful time of the year again...that’s right, FINAL EXAMS! YIPPEEE! Enjoy Tim like that glass of egg nog yer heart’s been yearnin’ for... *****************************************************************************

Tim, Jess, Mike, Barry and I had spent a lovely afternoon after classes at the library, and then decorating Tim’s bungalow.

“The lights are lovely, aren’t they girls?” Tim said, smiling with tired eyes.

Barry had gone to bed, his favorite pastime, which left Jess, Mike and I watching television with Tim. When the doorbell rang, I was the one to get up and reluctantly answer it.

“Dave? Dave the elf?”

“Yes, that’s right. I need to see Tim,” the four foot elf said, filing his nails. “right way..” He was dressed in green striped tights, a velvet hat complete with matching dress jacket, looking quite dapper.

“I remember you from before...when Tim had to climb that sunflower stalk,” I told him. “Hold on. I’ll get him. He’s watching Friends, so he’s not going to be happy....can you wait till the commercial?”

Dave burst with anger and pushed me aside. He was quite the fiery personality for such a small frame.

“Timothy! Tim! You gotta help me. That no good Claus gave me the axe this time at the package line! You gotta help me, Tim!”

Tim was wrapped up in a green blanket, dressed in his kimono and slippers, sipping tea. He had his feet up on the recliner and only continued to stare at the television.

“DID YOU HEAR WHAT I SAID, MAN!???” I thought his head would blow off.

Jess stretched her arm out unenthusiastically, turning the volume on the TV up with the remote. The Evil Lord scowled at Dave.

“We’re watching telly, Dave, can it wait? I know Ross is gonna get together with Rachel this time for sure....”

“NOOOO!!!”the irrate elf hollared. He jumped two feet in the air, dropping candy canes all over the floor.

“Did you say you worked on the package line? Is that like Santa’s little disgruntled postal office?” Mike asked.

Tim stood up at once, stomping into the kitchen. Dave followed. Tim stood listening to the tirade with his arms crossed. He smirked at us from across the room.

“I think Rachel and Chandler should get together and then Ross and the Ugly-Naked-Guy should have something going on the side....” Mike suggested.

“What about Monica?” I asked.

“Well, she could whip them into a salad...” Jess said, eating some chocolate pudding. Though it was Friday night, Tim made a point to video tape all his favorite shows during the school week.

He stomped into his bedroom, slamming the door. Dave walked back into the living room, a smug, yet satisfied look on his face.

“What are you so happy about?” Jess asked, still licking her spoon.

“I am going back to the North Pole to give that over-stuffed elf a piece of my mind!”

I sat up. “SANTA??”

Tim’s whirled out of his bedroom. We could see his sillouette from the dim light of the television. He was dressed head to toe in an what appeared to be a winter coat fit for an Eskimo in Siberia.

He turned the light on, and Jess stopped the video. It was green. It even had a giant hood that he secured with velcro and ties.


“I’ve got some business to take care of...” Tim said seriously. He went over to the computer, dumping his paper he was working on dilligently into a bag. Dave grinned ear to ear. The bells on his pointed toes jingled as he followed Tim into the garage.

“Tim? Where are you going???!” Jess called after him. I ran into the garage as Tim prepped his plane.


“I’ve got a bit of holiday shopping to finish up, girls...that’s all...”

“Now? The malls are closing!”

“Not where we’re going to shop,” he muttered, stepping up into the cockpit, tossing his bag into the back.


The shouting had woken Barry up and he came staggering out into the garage. “Hey, can’t ye keep it down, Tim?”

“No, I’ve got a job to do...going up to the North Pole...”

“Oh, shopping...can I come?” Barry asked enthusiastically.

Tim sighed. “I suppose....”

“CAN WE? CAN WE???” Jess and I begged, jumping up and down..

Dave shook his head. “NO! Tim, they’ll slow us up!”

“Must we have all this cheeriness? I just ate!” Mike groaned.

Tim was an old softey. He shook his head, and nodded. “Yes yes... Now go in the closet and bundle up...hurry now!” ******************************************************************************

The frozen air stung our faces in the back of the plane. Barry, Jess, Mike and I huddled together, trying to keep warm. Tim sang. Dave pouted.

“Sorry about the cold...” he apologized. “Just think about this. Now ye know ye could survive if ye were to get locked in a freezer...”

“Oh, that’s great Tim, bloody great,” Barry moaned, his teeth chattering.

“I’m turning into an ice pop!!,” I howled.

“That sounds fun,” Mike said flatly.

“Stop complaining back there,” Dave whined. “You’re the ones who wanted to come!”

“Hey MIKE!? HOW ARE YOU DOING THAT?!,” Jess exclaimed suddenly. Barry gasped, backing away.

“Your nose! How are you doing that??!” Indeed, his nose was glowing bright red. I could feel the heat coming now. My toes started to defrost.

“It’s a little trick I learned down under,” he explained. “I’ll have this plane toasty warm in no time...”

Dave puzzled. “He’s Australian?”

Tim turned around to have a look. “I’ll explain some other time...”

“It was always tough as a kid,” Mike went on. “All the other kids would laugh, and call me names....”

“You, the great and powerful Evil Lord?” Timothy scoffed.

“Yes,” he said in a low, convincing tone. “But I incinerated their Chistmas trees and caused a tropical storm to ruin their chances of a snow day.”

“Oh,” Barry gulped. “How thoughtful.”

“You’re so helpful, Mikey,” Jess said cheerfully, kissing him on the cheek.

“Yes, the spirit of Christmas is alive in yer heart,” Tim groaned sarcastically.

Soon, we were near our destination. Tim radioed the airport and prepared to land. Tim’s landings were always rocky, and we held on for dear life.

“Don’t worry everybody, I’ve got this under control!” he assured us confidently. Dave held on to his seat. Barry prayed. Mike called out.

“WHOO HOOO!” he screamed.

“YEEEE HAAAA!” Jess cackled.

“They’ve been under yer guidance much too long,” Barry told Tim.

Below, I could see the beautiful village, a fantastic array of mulitcolor wonder. It was like a dream. It was just a shopping center though, right? ...An example of the commericial exploitation of the good-natured people of America...

“It’s all about fervor,” Tim said with a smile.

“Tim watch out!!! You’re heading for the sweet shop!!!” Dave wailed.

With all the excitement, Tim had veered off path for the peculiarly multi-color lighted runway, and headed right for what appeared to be a gingerbread candy factory!

“AHHHHHHH!!!,” Tim screamed. Barry cursed him.

“Ye great bleedin’ idiot! Now we’re not going to make the sales!!” ******************************************************************************

Could it be? Slain at Santa’s Candy shop? A Christmas crash? What will become of our misguided heroes?! The new story should be up later this week, Dec 18ish. :) ***********************************************************************

No part of The Timothy Story or cartoon art may be used or reproduced without the author's explicit (and I mean explicit) permission. Thank you. Copyright Zucchtoons 1998 **********************************************************************

SUBMIT WITH FERVOR(and tell a friend!)

October 9th, 1940-December 8th, 1980 Remember John